267. flip the script
Most of us are so immersed in our concept of the world, so unconscious of the narrative we have constructed for ourselves, that we aren’t aware it’s just a script continuously running through our minds. We believe our script is a representation of “us” or our “true selves,” but in reality, it is just our thoughts. We feel so strongly about their truth because we practice these thoughts and ideas all day long, reinforcing their assimilation into our identity with each passing day.
It’s not obvious — until it’s pointed out — that we are not our thoughts, but we practice them so much that we start to identify with their meaning. We practice them from the time we get up in the morning, to the time we go to bed in the evening. And they’re even reinforced in our dreams as we sleep. We practice our thoughts so consistently, and for so long, that we get to the point where we aren’t even aware we are practicing them. We label these thoughts as “us,” but they’re not — they’re just something we’re thinking.
It’s important to understand that we are the thinker of our thoughts, not the thoughts themselves. A lot of the time, the thoughts and ideas that have defined who we are and how we approach the world are simply remnants of a past experience that is no longer serving us. Pay attention to the thoughts that come up automatically, you’re bound to realize that many of them are just part of the script you’ve been running forever.
153. change your outlook
We are all going to encounter hardship in our lives. When it happens, we will most likely ask the question, “why me?” No matter what it is, it’s always going to feel unfair to be dealt a bad hand. It’s understandable to be upset, and we all should have a moment to feel the weight of the situation. But after that moment we need to muster the courage to answer our own question.
When something bad happens to you, and you ask yourself, “why me?” — the only true answer is because you can handle it. Instead of thinking you are a victim of circumstance or encountering a bout of bad luck, embrace the fact that this is something you can handle. Change the way you frame what is happening. You’re not unlucky, stupid, or victimized, you’re blessed because you have the ability to encounter this negative situation and come out on the other side, whereas someone else could not have dealt with the blow.
It’s simply a different way to look at your experience. Instead of being crushed by the weight of a negative situation, answering the question with “because I can handle it” will allow you to take it head on and grow from the experience. It’s never easy to encounter the bad parts in life, but with the understanding that getting pushed to the edge of yourself is where the growth happens, will completely change your outlook.