331. just say no
Stop saying “Yes” to things that should be a “No.” The most valuable resource we have is our time, yet we often waste it on things we’re not fully invested in. We’re afraid to say, No. But why? Likely for fear of missing out, not being included, or letting someone down. This may be admirable to a certain point, but after a certain point it becomes imperative to realize that the choice you’re making isn’t serving you, nor the person you’re trying to appease.
It’s disingenuous to say, Yes, to things that aren’t going to fully arouse our interest and allow us to fully show up in the moment. When we continue to do so, we begin to wonder why our life is filled with mediocrity. Well, it’s because we haven’t given ourselves the time or the space in our schedule to explore the things that truly interest us.
A half-hearted, Yes, will not serve you. It doesn’t value your time, your interests, or your growth as a person. When you’re too busy simply showing up and participating in someone else’s interests rather than creating space to actively seek out your own, you’ll never be able to take full advantage of any opportunities that actually come your way. Inevitably, by saying, Yes, when you should be saying, No, keeps you busy living a mediocre life, distracted from what you should be exploring so that you can build a life you want. The solution is to be more selective with your time. Say, Yes to less so that you can have the time to find your passions. If someone asks you to do something and your automatic response isn’t “Hell Yeah,” then it should be a “No.”
255. what fills your time
We start new habits with the best of intentions. Placing our effort into areas that will help us move ourselves closer to the person we want to become, but sometimes we lose the motivation that got us started in the first place. When this happens, the popular excuse of “there isn’t enough time,” always comes up. The funny thing about that is for as long as you held the habit, there was enough time to complete it.
So where is the disconnect? It’s not that you lack time, but your motivation waned, and that is okay. Not all habits are meant to stick. However, be mindful what occupies the time you previously spent on your habit of self-improvement. If what you replaced the habit with isn’t of equal value or doesn’t help you progress to the person you are trying to become then perhaps you should rethink what you’re giving up. For example, if I gave up the habit of writing because “I couldn’t find the time,” yet spent an hour a day on social media, then I am not making a decision my future-self will benefit from. However, if I give up the habit of writing because I wanted to focus more on making videos as a form of self-expression or the exploration of ideas, then that seems like a good trade off.
So pay attention to what fills your time. If the habit you currently have isn’t working for you, that’s okay, change it up, just don’t replace it with something that is going to waste the time it’s elimination frees up.
252. time is finite
Time is finite. It’s the only unrenewable resource.
There isn’t a more effective way to figure out what is most important to us than to experience a shortage of time. What we choose to fit in those narrow moments of freedom, or deliberately place into our schedule because we can’t afford to miss, reveal to us what we truly value. We like to say things like, “if I only had more time…” but you don’t. And those important things you can’t live without, you always find the time to fit them in. So stop wasting your precious moments thinking about what you would do if you had more time, and instead think about what you could do to maximize the things you can’t pass off.
Worrying about what we can’t fit into our day still takes up time that we could be enjoying things we value. If you have been saying “if I only had the time…” about something longer than 3 months, chances are, you never will because it isn’t a priority. Let it go. Clear the space to focus on things that hold greater importance to you.
101. watch where your resources flow
What is the easiest way to know if the strategy you’re implementing will be successful? Watch where your resources flow. Whether it’s time, money, attention, or love — it really comes down to how you allocate your resources that will determine the outcome. If you want to be in shape, but choose to spend the majority of your free time watching Netflix and eating takeout, those 30 minutes a day spent at the gym aren’t going to amount to much. If you want to be in a relationship, but choose to take that person for granted by treating them as though they will always be there, those times you find it necessary to say “I love you” will eventually mean less and less. You might think you’re a dedicated person because you choose to go to the gym for 30 minutes a day, or only choose loving words when you feel its necessary, but the outcomes of those strategies are only going to result in failure. The expectations of these strategies aren’t aligned with the reality of the situation. If the decision you make about where you want to invest your mind, body, and heart aren’t consistent with the person you’re aspiring to be or the things you want to accomplish, you’ll never become that person who accomplishes those things.
60. you never get today back
If you’re not careful, occasional enjoyments like watching Netflix can turn into a chronic activity that fills your free time. The result is a lost opportunity to take action towards the life you want to lead, the body you wish to have, or the person you need to become. By choosing idleness over effort, you fall slave to your weaker impulses. Spending time watching TV, or any wasteful activity, means less time exercising, reading, writing, or working on your dreams. You are exchanging your future fulfillment for temporary pleasure. There is nothing wrong with enjoying your free time, but if it is consistently taking the place of putting in the necessary effort to fulfill your dreams, you are effectively trading your future for entertainment. And Tiger King was not that good!
Be mindful that the habits you choose to live by should be built upon the person you wish to become, So, be sure to use the time you have to your advantage because you never get today back.