290. stop failing, start learning
Stop failing and start learning.
We need to stop thinking in terms of success or failure every time something doesn’t work out the way we want. We didn’t fail, so much as we figured out that a certain path isn’t going to get us where we want to go. And with that tested approach out of the way, we can take a different path or develop a new technique that might yield better results.
We need to learn to embrace the moments that lead to learning, and not be afraid of them. Failures are inevitable with any endeavor, so if we reframe them or change the language of “failing” into something like “teachable moments,” they may not be so frightening to encounter. And because they aren’t as frightening, our confidence grows during the course of our journey instead of wavering. Each step, and misstep, grants us with more insight about how best do arrive at our destination.
182. mistaken destination
It’s easy to find someone to aspire to. The allure comes from our belief that this person is a finished product.
It’s our understanding that if we walk the same path, we can arrive at the same destination. So we mistakenly mirror all our efforts to those we look up to, in hopes that we can one day become just like them, without realizing that it isn’t about the destination, but the journey.
A wise man once said; “do not seek to follow in the footsteps of those you admire, instead honor their legacy by continuing to search for the things they sought.”
Too often we mistake the destination for the journey. We think, if we do all the things the person we wish to be like did, we can arrive at the same place. Yet, I can guarantee you, that if you had the privilege to ask whether or not they “arrived,” they would wholeheartedly disagree, and instead tell you that they have a long way yet to go.
It’s never going to be a bad thing to model your efforts after someone you aspire to be like, but don’t let your view on the destination become so myopic that you can’t enjoy the journey, because if you ever do “arrive” at that magical destination, your passion will quickly wane, whereas a dedication to the journey will offer a lifetime of fulfillment.
147. any road will get you there
If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there. It’s not going to be the most efficient way to accomplish anything specific, but just because you aren’t sure where you’re going doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lost. It’s something most people don’t like to admit, that most of us don’t know what we want. Somehow to be seen as “going somewhere” you need to have a definitive plan mapped out. Yet, part of life is figuring it out as you go. Research shows that only 6% of people work in the profession they aspired to when they were young, and a third of people end up in a career that has nothing to do with what they studied in college.
it’s not a bad thing to not always know where you’re going. Nor should you be ashamed to be lost at times. Life is about experience. It’s about discovering the parts you like, disregarding what you don’t, and creating yourself as you go. As long as the direction you’re traveling serves a purpose, by satisfying curiosities, mending past traumas, and improving your quality of life, what more can you really ask for?
135. detours
Taking the road less traveled can make all the difference. By exploring new avenues we gain more knowledge about our place in the world and how to move through it more effectively. And yet, the road less traveled may not be what we think. For some, it will be the dirt road with an undefined destination, and for others, a clearly marked highway paved with intention. The road less traveled is simply the one we travel the least. A necessary detour to reset our common approach. The extroverted person may best be served by disconnecting with the world for a while by staying in and reading a book, while the introverted person may benefit from engaging with the world and gaining a new perspective. Some of us need to get out. Some of us need to stay in. But we all need to take a detour sometimes.