88. responsibility

We all fuck up sometimes. Whether through misjudgment, absent-mindedness, or sheer stupidity, these only serve as excuses, if you rely on them to be part of the story you tell. In an effort to resolve a conflict, after a mistake or failure of your doing ask yourself, “Am I distorting this situation in a way that makes myself feel like a misunderstood hero? Am I spinning the story to make myself feel better? Am I trying to play the victim to protect my ego? What were my actions that contributed to the issues at hand?” 

Instead of believing that people don’t understand you, and are to blame for your failure, take responsibility for your actions. You made a mistake, fine. Say, “I fucked up.” That’s it. Simple, factual, and to the point. Own it and move on to rectifying the situation if possible. Don’t sit and try to explain it away with excuses for an hour. The truth lies in that one sentence, anything more will just produce excuses, not solutions. As soon as you start giving reasons and rationalizations, you’re trying to cover your misdeeds and protect your ego, and you’re not ready for responsibility.