179. refine, not define
Our history will always be a part of our story. Let it refine you, not define you. There is a choice when it comes to how we think, feel, and act. We can be guided by the pain or trauma of past events, which have the power to keep us from personal growth, or we can let go of what happened and choose to let the future we wish to encounter inform our decisions in the present.
If we live from the past, we will always be trying to fix things that happened years ago. Reliving something that cannot be changed is just going to keep you experiencing life in a similar fashion, with the same feelings that it brought about the first time, thus not allowing for growth. There is a choice with how you relate to events in your life. Let it go. If we can change the relationship with our history, allowing it to refine us instead of define us, then we can begin to institute the change we seek.
Looking back as a way to inform our decisions in the present will never serve us. It keeps us stagnant. Growth requires change. Looking forward, being future minded, will inform us of the moves we need to make in order to build the life we want.